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Deepak Chopra on LOVE

by Marissa on February 15, 2012

Valentine’s Day was pretty special this year. Not only did I launch my new blog and web site, but I made sure to do something nice for myself . When I found out that Deepak Chopra was presenting on the Path to Love at ABC Carpet & Home, I couldn’t miss it.

I don’t think I’ve ever been this close to him (I snagged a front row seat).

And I love the decor and little touches at ABC Home, especially in the Deepak Homebase event space.

I’m going to own one of these gorgeous meditation cushions very soon.

Before the event, I took myself to lunch at my new favorite hangout, JivamukTEA Cafe. Their spicy tempeh is so good.

And then I came home to this: Fisherman’s pie (a British classic), honey-glazed parsnips and salad

And this: red velvet cake

Decidedly not vegan/vegetarian/dairy-free but I’m willing to bend the rules for Valentine’s Day. The meal was divine.

I’m a lucky girl.

Dr. Chopra was insightful and inspiring as always. He spoke about the  stages of love which I’ll summarize, though only partly as eloquently as he did.

Stage 1: Attraction

We are attracted to  those who have the qualities we want more of and in this way, love is our greatest teacher. Being natural, authentic and comfortable with who you are is to be an attractive person.

Stage 2: Attention/Infatuation

Moving beyond what can be physically seen to seeing what others cannot see. This kind of attention requires self acceptance of your positive and negative traits, attention (deeply listening to the other in your own body), intention (the message you are sending), affection (caring for your lover’s well-being) and appreciation (verbalizing that you notice your lover’s strengths and accept his or her weaknesses).

Stage 3: Communion

Moving to this stage requires emotional intelligence, being in touch with the emotions of another and communication without drama.

For instance, when needs arise in a relationship: observe the need, state the feeling associated with it, state the need and request it from a place of vulnerability (will you do this for me?) Emotional toxicity from unfulfilled needs, not feeling emotions as they arise and learned habits commonly interferes with communion. Communion with another soul requires equality, integrity and empathy.

Stage 4: Intimacy

When there is communion, intimacy happens spontaneously. To have true intimacy is to have total loss of ego, total vulnerability and to be totally present.

Stage 5: Surrender/Acceptance

Giving up the need for total control and manipulation. and from here on out love assumes higher stages of consciousness.

Stage 6: Passion & Ecstasy

When sexual and spiritual energy become the same force. Passion awakens the masculine and feminine archetypes in your own being and when your partner is at the same stage, the relationship is capable of reaching ecstasy. There are three types of ecstasy: physical (sexual and sensual); mythical (awareness of archetypes in our own being),  sacred (a relationship with the Divine). All three create a unity consciousness.

Does this resonate with you?

If you live in NYC or are visiting, ABC is definitely worth the trip. They specialize in items for the home, but stroll on up to the second floor where you’ll find beautiful gifts, books and meditation CDs. And of course, don’t miss the farm to table restaurant ABC Kitchen (IF, you don’t mind waiting for a table or are lucky enough to snag a reservation).

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